Timing is everything, though. Joe Berkowitz edits books and writes stuff. He also has a Tumblr. Already a subscriber? Log in or link your magazine subscription. Account Profile. Sign Out. I'm in a lot of pain I think I'm gonna barf.
Jimmy : Chazz, Chazz they gotta get you to a hospital. Chazz : What, no and miss the smell of sweet gold not on your life. Chazz : I think I see the Virgin Mary! Jimmy : No, that's not her. Chazz : Ahh, my nutsack! Chazz : Don't make me kill her! Chazz : [shoots fire out of his fingers at end of performance].
Jimmy : Was the fire really necessary? Besides, you're too late; they already handed out the girls' medals this morning. Jimmy : Shut up, Michaels. That was textbook execution. Same scores I beat you with in Oslo. Chazz : [drunk while performing in "Grublets On Ice"] Hey! Hey, you little forest creatures! None of you sons of bitches try to be heroes! Chazz : [drunk while performing in "Grublets On Ice"] I just threw up in here, people.
That's the reality. Just another layer to the legend. I am nothing but a human onion! In fact, we all a Ugh, encore! Chazz : The night is a very dark time for me. Jimmy : It's dark for everyone, moron! Chazz : Not for Alaskans or dudes with night-vision goggles. Chazz : I see you have learned to work the Google on the internet machine. Jimmy : Watch my icy hot super slide.
Chazz : Do it. Chazz : So, how'd it go with your lady? Carve up any ice Chazz : I'm a sex addict and I'm attracted to women. Chazz : [Referring to his program] I hope you've brought your silver polish, MacElroy, 'cause that was gold. Jimmy : That was disgusting. Chazz : THAT, young man, is how babies are made. Chazz : I permanently call shotgun.
Jimmy : You do not get shotgun every time! Coach : [confidently] Okay, so what do you say? Let's try an Iron Lotus. Chazz : Are you nuts? Jimmy : Wha? We can't do that! Coach : C'mon. What are you talking about? Look, after all these years, I know what went wrong. The physics were off; it was a man and a woman. That's why it didn't work.
You're two men Jimmy : Those were the same scores I got, Einstein. We're tied! Chazz : You're high! Chazz : [backstage at "Grublets On Ice"] I hate my life. Chazz : You're living in the past, Sammi.
Chazz : Two men skating? That's a riot. A laugh riot. Coach : I don't see what's so funny. Search Topic E-mail Alerts Review. What are E-mail Alerts? Manage Alerts Create Your Own. Ebola toll rises in 'unprecedented' outbreak Report: MH a criminal investigation Life inside the densest place on earth Ocean Shield's mission of hope, uncertainty Cosmetics queen fights skin bleaching.
CNN U. So Will Ferrell's surely not the first name that comes to mind when considering the sport. Watch Ferrell and Heder get revealing When raunchy, rebellious Chazz has to share the winners' podium with winsome, antiseptic Jimmy, push comes to shove and they are soon trading blows in front of shocked fans and dignitaries -- and a TV audience of millions.
Letting it all hang out Ferrell -- who gave Sacha Baron Cohen a long, passionate kiss in "Talladega Nights" and who has stripped in pretty much everything except "Elf" -- knows that sexual humiliation earns big yuks. Will Ferrell. Languages Arabic Japanese Korean Turkish. A Time Warner Company. Now is the perfect time to take advantage of all the benefits Blades of Glory has to offer. You will save money on your maintenance costs and you may even get money back from your local water authority.
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